600th post

Say WHAT?

Yes, it really is my 600th blog post.

I can't believe I have had that much to say.

That much to complain about.

That much to laugh at.

But, alas, Blogger says it is so and so..it is true.

And for this post, it is fitting that I am neither complaining, nor laughing.

I am not even on my period in this post.

(Holy hell, can you even imagine? 600th post + menses = serious beotching)

I will be gloating in this post.

Gloating at the fun adventure I had in Hawaii.

This may be my last Hawaii post, but I think this was my favorite thing we did.

AT LOW-TIDE, WE WALKED TO CHINAMAN'S HAT (an island off the shore of Oahu) ON THE CORAL REEF. THEN WE HIKED TO THE TOP OF CHINAMAN'S HAT FOR AN UNOBSTRUCTED VIEW OF THE OCEAN.

I was super happy that we tried it and that we didn't die trying it.

Jodi and I together are a bad combination.  Stacy's ideas + Jodi's crazy = WARNING, WARNING

She is always willing to go along with all of my bad ideas.

(I will never forget the almond allergy, Dear sister-in-law Jodi).

I read about this adventure on a blog that I came upon while researching our Hawaii trip.

One blog. Just a few words. No real instruction. Some warning.

The blog mentioned a few dangerous things-
1. High tide
2. Tiger sharks
3. Technical climbing, not for the weak or inexperienced
4. Sharp coral rock

However..
I am like Steve Irwin (before he died..)..
I laugh in the face of danger,
and high tides,
and tiger sharks,
and climbing sharp coral rocks.

In other words, I am an idiot.

And unfortunately, Jodi is an idiot too and thought my proposal sounded A OK!
The only one of us that was of sound mind, was Brad, Jodi's husband.
He is always the yin to our yang--the smart to our dumb.
He thought it was a bad idea.

We ignored the yin. Our yang was much louder and forceful.

So here is our adventure in a nutshell.
Or blogpost as it were..

Above photo is us starting our trek across the coral.

At low tide.. or semi-low tide.

(We were a few hours late for LOWEST low tide.. whoopsie daisy!)

The others in the picture are some cute twenty-somethings that we met on the beach.
They had never done this adventure before so they wanted to come along with us.
They had a friend who stayed on the beach because she HAD done it before.
She decided to never do it again because it freaked her out.
AWESOME!
LET'S GO!

This is me.

Almost panicking.

We had lost our coral trail (dontcha just hate when that happens..)

I was thinking we were going to have to swim the entire way.
Let me just say, I am not a good swimmer.
And the more that I am required to be a good swimmer,
the less I am a good swimmer.
I was near hysteria (even with my floating board), but then

we regained our trail and onward we went.
Disaster averted.

Yippee! 

We didn't die.

(or did we... and we are in heaven right now, in this picture..)

Nope. No death yet.

The beginnings of our hike.

The middle of our hike.

Plus, some of Jodi's cleavage.

This is where it started getting sketchy.

Or sketchier.

Todd is trying to tell me that everything is A OK.

"Come this way"

"It's easy"

"I promise you will make it"

All words that I have heard before.

All words that make my blood turn to ice.

All words that make me realize he is trying to convince me 

to do something that I don't have the athleticism to try.

C'mon Jodi.

Bring those "girls" and come up the sketchy trail.

You can do it!

Todd says, we can do it!

Teensy bit of the sketch...

This pic was taken in a spot that I thought would be my last resting place.

I was unwilling to go any further.

The rock face was steep and unyielding.

I was scared.

I had a feeling of impending doom.

Todd was frustrated with his mule of a wife.

He kept yelling at me to "Come UP!"

"It is really easy!"

Jodi and Brad and I would not have done well in high school with peer pressure.

We all caved.

We all went up the steep, precarious cliff.

This is the picture of the twenty-somethings who scaled the precarious cliffs

with no shoes and 

obviously no clothes.

Funny thing-- they were from Salt Lake City too!

Fellow Mormons looking for alcohol-free adventure.

(It is a good thing we don't do drugs, can you imagine the stupid things we would do!)

Stupid twenty-somethings didn't tell me to pull down my shirt.

Hello, world.

Here is my muffin top!

Accentuated by horizontal stripes.

I sure do love those skinny beotches who took my picture.

This is us and the bikini clad mormons climbing back down the precarious cliffs.

HELLO!?

I was convinced that someone was going to die on this part.
So.. of course I snapped a picture...

Todd getting ready for his descent.

YEAH!

No death!

Nor accident!

Not even a scratch or a bloody toe!

My sister-in-law captured this shot of us making our way back.

WE ARE ALIVE!

AND... I CAME HOME AND UPPED MY LIFE INSURANCE

FOR THE NEXT TIME JODI AND I TRAVEL TOGETHER!

YEAH FOR RESPONSIBLE MOMS!

YEAH FOR CHINAMAN HAT HIKE!

YEAH FOR MUFFIN TOPS!

YEAH FOR 600 BLOG POSTS!