Immersion

Grandma(s) this is for you:

This is what Chinese Immersion Week 9 looks like.
In his underwear.

Had a most wonderful FHE tonight. 
3/5 people felt the spirit! I would say we won!
We watched an episode of "The District", which is my new favorite show.

I am all about the reality series, and to be able to watch one that does not include people swearing, overturning tables, yelling at each other, etc.. is refreshing.  I LOVE THIS SERIES. I highly recommend it.  Tanner was very touched by the episode we watched, as were Todd and I.  I cry every single time I watch an episode.  Tonights episode including a segment about an investigator asking the missionaries if his prior baptism by another church was valid in their eyes.  Watching this scene with the missionaries struggling not to offend, but teach that you must be baptized by immersion by the proper authority was hard.  The investigator was offended and it was heart-breaking! I admire our young men and young women who immerse themselves in the gospel of Jesus Christ.  Who humble themselves and recognize that they are only instruments with which our Heavenly Father instructs his beloved children. The courage and faith that these missionaries display is incredible.  The way that the spirit can change lives is magnificent.  I am so proud to be a member of this wonderful church, but more importantly--I am so glad that I have the gospel in my life and that my children have it as well.  I just am so grateful for it, and so sad that not everyone who hears this message, actually listens to it...

Doubles

Maddie has been asking for Tanner to go on a double date with her since he turned 16.

Tanner, being a man, was resistant to this.  Actually, he feigned interest to appease his sister, but then would never commit and actually call someone.

I knew the reason-I mean, that is hard. To call a girl.
Call, not text.
And speak.
With your voice.
Using English.
No texting.

So, Tanner was noncommittal.
Maddie become irritable.

So, I got Big Daddy involved.
And by Big Daddy, I mean my Big Daddy.
My sweet hunk of man meat, Todd.
My kids really have no respect for my opinion at all, and when I really want to get my way or to get them to listen, I just get the Big Daddy involved.

Typically, he only has to say a sentence or two.
My orations and arguments can go on for hours.  And hours.
But still, I get nowhere.

Big Daddy comes in the room.
Plops down on the sofa.
Looks at the child.
Calmly and peacefully asks them in respectful, polite ways..
what the hell the hold up is...
Well, not really.  That is what I do.

But, really. His mere presence makes my children sit up straighter and knock off their crap.
He is NEVER mean. Unlike their mother.
He is NEVER demanding. Again, I am opposite.
He is respected and loved.  Again, I am like the yappy little neighborhood dog that you want to kick when you walk by it.

Whatever, it's truly true.

Anywho, I digress.

Big daddy comes in and in a matter of minutes, Tanner is roll playing making the call to a girl.

The best 48 minutes of my life was then created right in front of me.

Maddie was the girl.  Tanner was himself.
He called her (Maddie, his sister) on her phone.
Remember- we are all seating in the family room - Maddie is 3 feet away from him, but he had to practice actually calling and speaking on his phone. Maddie offered to write him a script.

We roll played for nearly 32 minutes.  Practice makes perfect!!
It was quite entertaining to witness.  I wish I could have recorded it.
Tanner would have killed me.
In fact, I might die after this posting.
Totally worth it.

After all of that practice, it was do or die time.
Tanner wanted to DIE, but Big Daddy said, "No, you must DO."
So, he did.

I must admit I was terrified for my young one.
But, my fears were baseless.
He handled that 1st phone call like a pro.
Like a boss.
Unfortunately, the cute girl couldn't go-she had dance.  She asked if they could do it the next night-but no, Maddie was going to be gone.  So, bummer. Strike one, first pitch.

We were not about to let him stop now!!
You got the first one over with...Keep going!!
So, he calls the second girl.
Lots of very charming and calm words coming from my teenaged son-I was sure this would be it!!
Alas, she also had dance (is that this generation's "I am so sorry, but I have to wash my hair"?).  She asked her mom if she could miss it. NO was the response.  Strike 2.

CRAP.  My boy.. my sweet sweet little man child.
Okay, breathe Momma.
Big Daddy will handle this.
Gives him a pep talk. A butt slap.  A fist pump.
Tanner is back.
Ready to make the third call for his first real date.

He steps up to the plate, swings and HITS IT OUT OF THE PARK.
I witnessed it.
It was magnificent.

Maddie was thrilled.
Tanner was relieved.
Todd and I were exhausted.

Look closely-- I think the double date was a success.
It consisted of picking out pumpkins, slurping some Jamba Juice.  They came back to the house to carve the pumpkins, which I quickly shot down due to the many recent trips to the ER. Instead, they spray painted them and then I made them hot chocolate.

Thanks big sister Maddie for being willing to push your brother out of his comfort zone.
Thanks Big Daddy for once again, helping make my world a better place.
Thanks Tanner.  You and Maddie role playing calling the girls was the best thing to happen to me in about 2 1/2 years.  It was truly inspiring.
Thanks, Maddie P. for saying "yes" to my sweet boy and for being a good sport when he spray painted you and your very expensive sweater.

Sadie, her own personal paparazzi

Every once in awhile, Sadie steals my phone. She loves to take pictures of herself and her many beautiful faces. She loves to take unflattering pictures of me and Sophie (Sophie wouldn't speak to her for days after she saw her picture..).   I am not sure how she even knows how to operate this phone, because most days, I don't know how to operate it.  It is frightening how easily the young ones figure these new fangled gadgets out.  It just doesn't seem right that my children are smarter than me.  Smarter and a bit more self-obsessed, obviously.

I warn you.. It is a journal entry... and it is long...

Some days are harder than others when you are a mom.

Can I get an AMEN?

Some days, no matter their cuteness, 

my kids push me to the edge of insanity.

I love them, I do.

It is just some days, I want to climb in a hole and not mother for a few hours.

Or days.

I am trying to raise thoughtful, unselfish and grateful children.

That is a 24 hour, 7 days a week job.

Sometimes I get bugged that I can't take a few 15 minute breaks, plus a lunch break and a week or two of paid time off.

Some days my kids are angels.

I am singing in my heart.

There is definite sunshine in my soul

I am proud.

I feel as though I may be winning the war.

THEN..

Some other days occur.

On those days, I feel like I am doing more damage than good.

They complain about doing chores.

They complain about the homemade dinner I thoughtfully prepared.

They ignore me (but, listen to their dad, of course).

They throw tantrums.

Tonight, however, the bad attitudity (it's a word, moron) reached a fever pitch with my little Lamanite, Luke.

As he stomped his way to his room

-(mad that he had to eat his dinner)-

he called out,

"Mom, you are really mean!"

I realize this may not be a big deal at some homes,

but in my home, it is NOT okay.

This mommy doesn't tolerate sassy very well.

At the same time, 

Sadie was whining because Tanner exited out of her computer game.

Tanner was trying to correct her.

His correction and her whining were getting louder and louder.

My fuse was getting shorter and shorter.

My head was pounding.

As Lukifer loudly shared his opinion of his dear mother-

who gained 65 pounds to have him,

went through labor,

squeezed him out of my lady parts, 

loved him,

nurtured him,

BREAST FED HIM FOR 10 MONTHS (big deal for this momma),

clothed him,

carried him,

comforted him,

fed him (how dare I make him eat soup!!??),

saved him from death a few dozen times,

medicated him,

birthday parties, 

Christmas presents,

etc....

"Mom, you are really mean!"..

Pretty much was like the matador waving a 

red flag at an angry bull.

I sent him to his bed.

I sent Sadie to her bed.

I sent my 16 year old son to his bed.

WHY DIDN'T I JUST SEND MYSELF TO BED??

Dumb, so dumb.

After calming myself enough to face him,

we had a "conversation" about why he is not allowed to speak to 

his mom like that.

He had tears in his eyes.

He said he was sorry.

Did it make me feel better?

Of course not.

I don't want to have to get angry with my kids to 

have them listen to me.

I want to be like my husband and say things once,

in a kind manly way,

and have my kids respond.

It is annoying being the mom sometimes.

I know I will survive this gloomy day.
I have had others like this day and worse, and have survived.
I also realize that I will have many a glorious, sunshiny day.

It may go like this...

My children will wake at 8:00 a.m.
and will sing me awake with the classic
"Mother, I love you.
Mother, I do..."

They will make their beds and straighten their rooms
with nary a complaint or a whine.
They will come and ask if they can help me with breakfast.
"Oh, Mother! How wonderful that you made us oatmeal for breakfast! You are truly a wonderful person!"

They will give me a hug and a kiss before telling me
how magnificent I look in my robe and bedhead.
Luke will help Sadie brush her teeth
and Tanner will help Luke tie his shoes.
Sadie will help Sophie wake up.

We will cuddle as we read scriptures
and one by one, my sweet angels will
thank me for teaching them the gospel.

No unkind word shall pass a lip.
No one will be pushed, hit or pinched.
No one will ask to play Halo.
They will instead ask if they can take a nap
and ask if I would like to join them.

After the nap, they will wake and quietly 
go about their homework or work on a quilt for the needy.
Sshh. Don't wake Mother.
She needs to rest!
I will awaken again to sweet tunes being
sung by my children...
"I often go walking in meadows of clover..."
They will know all of the words, too.

Again we will cuddle as we nestle into bed.
We will play a board game.
Verily, no contention will come to pass.
Love will be spoken here.

As we eat a fantastic dinner prepared by my husband
(I know, I am really reaching now!!)
we will share thoughts and feelings about our day.
My children will testify of the grandness
and goodness of being an Ashby child.
They will share experiences and challenges they have faced.
They will listen as I counsel gently with each of them.

As we gather together for a family prayer,
kneeling & holding hands in solidarity-
my children will gaze at me with love and thanksgiving.
A non-memorized prayer will be uttered.
Every eye will remained closed.
No one will laugh during this prayer (it really does happen
quite often at our house-I know, Wo, until me!).

I will go to sleep 
(amazed that I could sleep at all after my 3 hour nap)
with contentment and satisfaction of a job well done, 
a day well spent.

OKAY, I REALIZE THAT IS JUST A HORRIBLY FREAKY DAY.
IF THAT ACTUALLY HAPPENED, 
I MIGHT THINK I WAS IN THE TWILIGHT ZONE.
OR THE CELESTIAL KINGDOM.

WHICH IF THAT IS THE CASE,
I THINK THAT THE CELESTIAL KINGDOM IS OVERRATED.
I MIGHT JUST OPT OUT.
FREAKY, JUST FREAKY.

Tanner's Great Adventure

Shut up.

Just shut up.

This is my son, in the ER.

Yes, I think someone has Munchausen's Disease.

Or maybe, just Hypochondriacism.

(I know that is not a word, shut up again.)

2 words-

KIDNEY STONES.

At the tender age of 16.

On the day before his last football game of the season.

So sad.

There is not enough medication in the world to take away kidney stone pain.

Poor poor urethra and ureters.

And pride.

Tanner had to have his private parts (or "tenders" as he likes to call them) handled by a female MD.

Just to make sure it wasn't testicular torsion.

TMI?

My blog, my choice.

Shut up again.

Then, that night was a wonderful surprise.

An invitation to the next dance which is girls choice-Bingham Ball.

It's a formal dance, which means renting a tuxedo!!

Woot, Woot!!

Tanner was excited to see who was asking him and his shredded ureters to the dance.

He was a bit dreamy after finding out who was extending the invitation, but then again

that could have been the Percocet.

This girl is from a wonderful family in our last ward.

It will be her very first date and it is a great compliment that she wants to go with my son.

I am so excited for them, they are going to have a blast.

Can you see the little hole in the cake where her name was?

Such a cute idea-if you can't tell by the picture, it is 2 bundt cakes, one upside down
and then another one on top of it.  A green ice cream cone completes the pumpkin cake.
So cute! And really sooo yummy!

I tell you, it is the most wonderful time of the year!!

He answered in a really cute way.

At least I thought it was cute.

He got her a bouquet of flowers, a stuffed animal, some candy bars and a card.

All of the items had a price tag on them..

(i.e. flowers...$8.99, stuffed animal...$4.99, favorite candy bars... $2.39 etc.)

And then the card said..

"A date with you to the Bingham Ball... priceless!"

I know... so special...

Best app of ALL time!

Do not kid yourself..

This is the best waste of 2 hours of my entire life.

I learned that Tanner has a myriad of hideous faces.

It's weird, because he is such a handsome young man with a lovely face.

But, when face bombing...he his atrociously ugly.

I have learned that when face bombing with Madison,

be prepared to see the devil.

It is basically like playing with a Ouji board.

You will see the devil in this post..

I have learned that my cat lady friend is always good for a laugh.

Well, I already knew that.

She be silly!!

I learned that Tanner with long hair also is reminiscent of 

some stoners I once knew.

These are just a few of the hundreds of pictures we took.

Get your emesis basin ready, you will be nauseated, perhaps even vomit.

This last one may be my all time favorite.

My son.

My beautiful son.

Witha smashed in face..

Look at Luke.

Wrong, just wrong.

Wonderful (and annoying)

Here is the wonderful...

My sweet boy, Luke, turned 7 this past weekend.

Yep, we had Homecoming, General Conference, & Birthday Celebration

all packed into a 48 hour period.

Oh.. let's not forget a trip to the ER!! (annoying)

(see below)

My husband was thinking clearer than I and decided against

the gun, bow & arrow, and knife that Luke wanted for his birthday.

Instead he got the usual toys-

-Nerf gun (more bullets to pick up-Yeah for me!!)

-toy cars (more cars to pick up-Yeah for me!!)

-Avengers DVD 

-a University of Utah flat hat (how many does one child need?)

-a wiggle car (love it!!)..

Todd's contribution to Luke's birthday was

a set of football pads and a REAL helmet!

As if his idea was less dangerous than my gun idea...

Luke looking like a football stud..

Once you get him on his back, 

he can't get up because the helmet is so heavy.

Gave us lots of laughs as they played...

NOW, TO THE ANNOYING..

Stabbed myself with scissors while trying to extricate

the cars from the box.

WHY DO YOU NEED THE FREAKIN' JAWS OF LIFE

TO OPEN A FREAKIN' SET OF CARS!!!???

Stupid packaging moron idiots....

Went right into my joint and did a little bit of damage...

5 stitches and a Diet Coke later...

Let us do a quick reminder that this happened on the day of Homecoming 

when I hosted breakfast and the day activity.

As well as had them all back at my house before the dance to take pictures.

I would like to now draw your attention to my life on the day of

Homecoming for Herriman.. click here  to be stunned by my good fortune!

My sweet boy, reading.

(notice his cool flat hat, worn backwards like any

stud muffin hooligan would do it!)

I love you more than anything, Luke!

I can't believe how fast you are growing up!

Please stop!

Again, I have this mothering thing totally under control.

Notice the 3 candles.

Yes, I know he is not 3, but he would have had none if up to me.

My sweet neighbor donated these to the cause.

Luke didn't seem to care. 

Loved little Sadie during Conference taking notes.

She took notes throughout Sunday session. 

Love all wonderful and annoying moments in my life.

Wouldn't be right if we couldn't have both!!

Crying

This will be an unusual post for me.
No swearing or smart-alec comments.
Boring, I know.

I feel... well... I feel ALOT, right now.

This weekend's announcement at Conference came right in the middle of Tanner's Homecoming Extravaganza.  Lots of noise and lots of messes were distracting me from listening to The Word.  Maddie called me right after the announcement was made and announced, "Did you hear, I can go on a mission right now!?" So excited, so happy.  I immediately verified it and starting feeling...well... feeling ALOT!  I couldn't cry with the entertaining I was doing, even though I wanted to.  I felt the Spirit witness to me that this was a magnificent blessing.  This blessing was church-wide, but strangely felt like it was just for me, just for Maddie.

We have had many conversations about Maddie's desire to serve a mission, but not wanting to wait until she was 21.  We have had many conversations about knowing the will of the Lord in your life.  We have had many conversations about her love of travel and love of service.  She has an unending enthusiasm for different cultures and seeing the world.  She cherishes her time spent in the Philippines. Most recently, before Conference (or B.C., as it will be referred to), she has wanted to join the Peace Corp and/or do a study abroad.  She has been searching for what it is she is supposed to do.  As her Mom, I am amazed at her drive to not just coast.. she wanted something more.  Every time we would talk, she would have a new idea for something she could do that she was passionate about.  Most times, I would say, "What you are describing is a mission!!"  And she would say, "I know, but I can't do that right now!"

And now, I know that the Lord is aware of my daughter.  I know that Church policy wasn't changed for Maddie alone.  But I know this change is an individual answer to prayers for her and by her.  I have always known that this girl could and would be a tremendous force for good.  I have always wished that she could go on a mission and feel of the blessings that I know she would receive by serving the Lord in that way.  Wishes can come true, but more certain than that- prayers are heard and answered in ways that are stunningly powerful and good.

It is easy to say, "I want to serve a mission", but when you get to actually make that decision, I am sure it is hard.  I have been surprised at how unwavering Maddie is about her decision.  I think she decided as soon as she heard the announcement.  I believe in my heart that Maddie feels the Spirit telling her she is needed in some far off land, or some boring place like Idaho.  I believe with all of my soul that she will be a fantastic missionary and I have absolutely no hesitation in supporting her decision.  I know that it will bring many challenges and hardships, but I know that she will learn more about the love of her Heavenly Father and Savior by serving them in this way than any other thing she could do.  I am proud of her for this big step.

Crying, crying, never stopping this weekend.  Crying because I am so exceptionally happy for all of the wonderful young people who are so eager to do this amazingly hard thing.  I really don't know where the Church plans on putting all of the new missionaries they are going to be getting.  Mr. Mac doesn't have enough suits stocked up and hey! Somebody better get on opening a Miss Mac.  In teaching the youth, I have known for many years that the teenagers in this generation are so strong.  The good ones have such stronger testimonies at their young ages.  I think this is going to be a testimony builder for many families.  I look forward to the next 9-10 months, preparing myself to be a mother of a missionary.  I have dreamt of this day, and the Lord has sought fit to gift me with it early, with a child who has such a strong desire to serve him.  I am humbled and grateful.

More crying, crying.  I am so blessed.