He is just too much...

Exhibit 1

Luke and Tanner were jumping on the trampoline, having fun, being boys.

Then there was high-pitched screaming.

Now... Luke is all boy, except when it comes to his scream. It was a loud, very ticked off, very traumatic feminine-type scream.

I shuffled to the rescue, already weary from all of the "fires" I put out as Firefighter Mom..

Me: "What happened??"

Luke tried to tell me, but he was "no speaky english". I think it may have been some dialect of english, but Tanner had to translate for me.

Tanner: "I accidentally scratched his back as we were jumping."

Me: "Scratched his back with what?"

Tanner: "My toenail."

Ooooo... that is nasty. Have you seen a 14 year old football players toes?? I hurriedly donned gloves and a mask (kidding) and peroxided the toe gash. All was well, until I decided that it would be a good idea to put a bandaid on it. Seriously, I make my own life hell sometimes. Of course, I put the bandaid on in such a way that whenever Luke moved, it pulled his skin, thus causing the aforementioned girl-screams and much drama. So, another brilliant idea... I will pull the bandaid off. Big mistake... the bandaid drama lasted several hours.

So as Luke was saying his prayers that night this trauma was on his mind.

Luke: "Hefney Fader, tanks for da day, tanks for our food, tanks for our tramp to jump, please bwess Tanno not to nail me in da back again...."

Gotta love it. Everytime they go to the tramp now I have to warn Tanner not to nail Luke's back.

Exhibit 2

While standing in the midst of his toy room with the equivalent of $50,000 worth of toys Luke asks when I will ever buy him any new toys.

Me: "Look around. You already have too much crap!"

Luke: "But I want more crap than this!"